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“I didn’t want to give up on life”

Rambai Das was kicked out of her marital home when she was 20 for giving birth to a girl a second time. Grieving personal losses, she became a farmer despite taunts from others. Now a success, she dreams of her daughter becoming a nurse.

Bargarh, Odisha

I was 16 when my parents got me married. When I gave birth to a girl, all hell broke loose. My husband and his entire family turned against me.

When their abuses crossed all the limits and I could no longer tolerate it, I walked out of my husband’s house.

Though it became a court case, we reconciled. I returned to my husband’s house hoping that everything would be fine. But destiny willed otherwise.

When I gave birth to my second daughter in 1999 things went out of control and I was driven out of the house.

Returning to my parents’ house was my only choice.

Misfortune struck again when my 9-year-old older daughter fell ill with brain malaria. With no money, I couldn’t take her to a good hospital. And I lost her.

Soon my husband passed away and my hopes of a reconciliation were gone.

I was miserable – completely shattered.

But I didn’t want to give in to my misery or resign to my fate and give up on life. I decided to face life for my second daughter, who was then a toddler.

To add to my woes, my family’s responsibility fell on me when my stepfather deserted us. I couldn’t provide two square meals a day.

I decided to become a farmer, since I used to work in the field with my parents.

farming 2.5 acres of land

I took 2.5 acres of land on an annual lease of Rs 10,000 to begin farming. The kind landlord asked me to pay at the year end.

Farming all by myself was so hard, but I had no other option.

At times, I didn’t get labourers to till the land. So I sold my ornaments and bought a power tiller to continue farming. It was difficult, but I learned to operate it.

Now, I earn an income from farming and I’m not dependent on others.

I till, spray pesticides, I sow and I harvest. I take the harvested vegetables to the market in my bicycle.

Male farmers who taunted me when I first started respect me now. I’m happy that things have changed for me, thanks to farming.

I have no regrets. While destiny took away a lot from me, it also gave me a lot – courage and confidence mainly.

The woman who used farming to gain independence, confidence, and self-esteem.

Now people invite me to share my farming experience. I’ve got many awards, even from our chief minister and the prime minister.

But, unfortunately, I’m yet to get the land they’d promised.

Everyone praises me as a successful farmer. But I haven’t got any government benefit meant for farmers. I couldn’t even get crop insurance as I don’t own the land.

I grow vegetables and earn about Rs 15,000 per month from farming.

I take care of my widowed mother too.

I’m happy I could provide my daughter a decent life. She’s even pursuing a nursing course.

My only dream is to see her serve people. And then I can be satisfied that I’m a successful mother too.

Reporting by Sarada Lahangir, a Bhubaneswar-based journalist, who writes about development, conflict, gender, health and education. Photos by Aditya Romansa (Unsplash), Mahendra Sahu and Sarada Lahangir.